Marriage & Love9/12#09 / 57
One question in the middle of a fight
Connection Regret·All ages
When an argument ran long, April and her husband would stop and ask one thing: "Which of us is this more important to?" The answer was usually obvious — one side was a ten-year habit, the other today's mood. The one who cared more won; the other gave way. Giving way wasn't a loss, just an answer to a question. That single question carried them past dozens of near-breakups.
If we were in some sort of struggle over something, we would stop and say, 'Which one of us is this more important to?'
— April, 72
TODAY’S PRACTICE
When a conflict passes ten minutes, ask: whose thing is this?
#WhoseThing#YieldWell#Unstuck
SOURCE
Cornell Legacy Project interview
Read the original